Trip From Hell

I don't normally talk about my personal life much in this blog but I feel for once I have to stand up on my soapbox and rant a little. I figure if I had to deal with this crap for the last few days, the interwebs can deal with me writing about it.

As most people know, I travel a lot for work. I'm usually out of the country at least once every couple of months. Because of that, I tend to feel rather lost/naked when I don't have my passport on me. In preparation for an upcoming trip to Nigeria, I had to send my passport off to the Nigerian High Commission in Ottawa to get an entry visa. This is a pretty normal practice. Unfortunately the application process is a little...convoluted. For example, they require a signed copy of the online application form. However, there is no way to print out the application after you have finished it. In addition, the online application consists of 4 separate pages of information. So I ended up having to re-fill in the entire form, print out each page, sign them, and send them off. Thankfully we use an immigration/visa consultant who is familiar with these sorts of things and can act as a liason between ignorant people like me and foreign consulates.

Unfortunately, I was also scheduled to go to Houston this week for training. After not hearing back from the Nigerian High Commission by Wednesday of last week, I talked to my immigration consultant and asked her to get the Nigerian High Commission to send back my passport, with or without the visa. Thursday I was notified that my passport was on its way back and would have my visa. Again unfortunately the Nigerian High Commission will (for whatever reason) only ship using Canada Post. They had shipped my passport using Canada Post's Next Day A.M. Priority Courier.

However, Friday morning came and went. No passport. Apparently they had missed the cutoff for Next Day A.M. service by about 45 minutes and my passport had been received in the collection for Friday Next Day service. But this is Canada Post. They don't work weekends. Next Day A.M. meant Monday morning.

So the only option available to me was to head down to Canada Post's main sorting depot on Saturday morning. I arrived to find a mostly empty building. Not counting security, there were approximately 4 people working. One of them managed to tell me that they were shutdown until Sunday afternoon and had approximately 1.4 MILLION pieces of unsorted mail.  I was told that the odds of finding my passport in that pile was almost nonexistent.

This meant it was time to try rebooking. After 2 hours on the phone with the company travel agent, the hotel I was booked in, and the limo companies transporting me to/from the airports in Edmonton and Houston, everything was rebooked for Monday night. I would go to work and hope that my passport arrived in time.

So Monday morning arrives. After spending Sunday night packing and preparing to travel, I was hopeful that I'd actually get to go. Slowly the morning passed away and no passport arrived. I all but gave up on my chances of going. Just after lunch, Canada Post's tracking website was finally updated and showed that my passport had been put on a truck in Edmonton at 10:50 am. But where in the city was it?

My ride to the airport was booked for 2:30. Finally, at 2:00, I found someone able to provide some real help. Our receptionist mentioned that Canada Post sometimes just drops courier packages in our mailbox. I stood at the window with baited breath as she walked across the street and returnee with an armful of mail. And in that armful my passport was waiting for me. I couldn't believe it. One would think that for something as important as a passport, a signature would be required. But I'm not one to look a gift horse in the mouth. I finally had my passport with 30 minutes to spare.

Naturally, my ride to the airport was 5 minutes late. Thankfully I allotted some extra time. At 3:00 I finally arrived at the airport. I finally started to think that I'd actually make it. I went to check in. The desk agent couldn't find my booking. I pulled out my itinerary. Somehow my travel agent had rebooked me for Sunday night and not Monday night. Perfect.

So I call up the travel agent as fast as I could. Fortunately there were still seats available and it was relatively easy to make the change. Or so she said as she put me on hold. 20 minutes later it's getting to be questionable as to whether I could make the flight. So I head to the ticket desk. The ticket agent tells me that she can see my travel agent is in the process of changing the ticket but isn't finished. So she issued me what was essentially a conditional ticket, put my luggage on standby, and told me to run for the gate. I was still on hold. So I put my on-hold phone through the x-ray machine and hoped I wouldn't miss anything. I got through security, picked up my phone, and within seconds heard "Mr Constam you're good to go."

I run up to the gate just as boarding was starting. Of course this means the gate agent is too busy and can't verify my ticket. After another agonizing 10 minutes, she finally gets to me and checks me in. I'm set. Except that my departing flight to Calgary was leaving out of a gate where they dock small planes at lettered gates. I was told to go to door H. Door H is near the end of the right side of this long hallway. I get there and there's no plane. I run back to the start of the hall, head down the left side and just run as hard as I can. Th plane was at door E, at the end of the right side. I'm the last one on board. I look at the flight attendant and ask "Will this plane actually take me to Calgary?" She replies "Why wouldn't it?" I quip "You have no idea the day I'm having..."

I'm finally in my seat. I'm set. I only now have to manage to collect my luggage, pass through US customs, and get through security in my hour and five minute layover in Calgary. Then the pilot comes on and says that we'll be delayed a few minutes because Calgary's airspace is busy. Great.

I arrive in Calgary 13 minutes late. I start running again. Seriously, if running through airports was an Olympic sport, you could give me the gold medal right now. I get to the American departures area and stop to wait for my luggage. I had no idea if it even made it on the plane due to my temporary stand-by status. Ten agonizing minutes later, my suitcase appears. I manage to fly through US customs and manage to get through security with only a quick full body scan and minor bag search. (Seriously, for me, that's a good deal.)

With 15 minutes to spare, I jogged up to my departure gate for Houston. Suddenly, it occurs to me that since my ticket was a last minute purchase, I might be in a good enough class to get an upgrade using a normally useless blue system-wide upgrade certificate. I was right.

So after what was a rather insane day, I was rewarded with a big comfy seat, a row to myself, an ice cold beer, and a wonderful dinner of chicken curry and rice.

As much as I am still angry with Canada Post, I do have to thank some amazing people and companies: my travel agency BCD Travel for acting so fast, Air Canada's ground crew in Edmonton and Calgary for being immensely accommodating, and my wonderful flight attendant Barry on AC8106 (YYC->IAH) for making my day end on a good note.

I never want to apply for a visa again. I think I'd rather stay home...