Air Travel - Always a Good Story

The best part about flying a lot is that you end up with a lot of stories about the random crap you've been through.

Today was no exception.

So the plan today was flying on Air Canada from Edmonton (YEG) to Baltimore (BWI) via Toronto Pearson (YYZ). I was to depart Edmonton at 7:00 am.

I wake up at the ungodly hour of 4:30 am to make sure I had enough time. After a shower, I pull out my phone for a quick email check. There's an email from Air Canada saying my flight has been delayed from 7:00 am to 8:20 pm arriving in Toronto at 8:00 am tomorrow.

(Aside: At this point in time (I now realize) I should have been suspicious because there was no notice informing me of what YYZ - BWI flight I had been rebooked on.)

So my heart essentially stops working as I dig around for the toll free number for Air Canada reservations. After being on hold briefly, I get an agent (miraculously, an anglophone). I tell him what's going on. He looks at his system and says "Hmmm that's weird. Let me put you on hold and I'll have a look into it."

Meanwhile, I check both Kayak (http://www.kayak.com) and FlightStats (http://www.flightstats.com). Both show the flight on time at 7:00 am. Odd. So I head over to Air Canada's website and my brain promptly explodes. They show the flight as on time but list the departure time the same as the email I received. Also odd was that they showed the flight being over 14 hours long. Normally, it's 4.

Finally the Air Canada agent returns and says he's waiting to hear back from someone who's calling YEG to check with them as they'll have the latest information. On hold again.

An agonizing 16 hours (actually, 3 minutes) later the Air Canada agent comes back and tells me YEG says the flight is on time.

Naturally all of this has taken some time. So now I'm running late. I rush out to my car to get to the airport.

I finally arrive at the terminal and discover that my flight (AC106) is not shown on the departure displays. I check in. No problems.

So I'm just about to start boarding (on-time) and I can't help but wonder what the hell happened to Air Canada's computers this morning.

More to come if the drama returns..

Things Are Picking Up

I imagine this post will be only a few sentences; I haven't had a whole lot of time to say much in the last few weeks, as this time of the year generally involves a lot of activity and travel for us, and 2011 has been no different...

I recall speaking a few weeks back about 14,000 on the TSX feeling like kryptonite, and it now appears that we may finally be seeing the result of QE2 getting up and leaving the table. The TSX closed just shy of 13,100 on Friday, and while a short-duration reversal back to the mid-13s is probably in order, a downward trend seems established.

The only question that remains is when QE3 will be announced. The US is not, and won't be, in a position to avoid both a) increasing the debt ceiling, despite the political noise this is currently generating, and b) avoiding further rounds of "Quantitative Easing".

The governments of the G20 have made it clear that they are either unable or unwilling to act in the manner necessary to bring expenses back in line with tax receipts. What would you say if your neighbor came up to you and said that he would continue to knowingly spend a great deal more than he makes until 2014? Just kidding, the majority of Canadians would probably invite the neighbor in to view their new credit-line-financed home renos over a glass of Cristal on granite in front of a 52" television continually tuned to HGTV (except when the only show on that channel worth watching is on).

What an age we live in; I may have to refill my popcorn bowl a few more times here on the positive net worth end of the theater, but the feature presentation is growing nearer, and it's going to be a good one.

Evil Genius Smarties Plan

It occurs to me (as things of this nature so often do) that there is an excellent way to twist the "always eat the red ones last" marketing scheme for Smarties into an evil genius plan.

It's quite simple, really. Lace all the Smarties colours save the red ones with some sort of slow-acting poison. Then, distribute exactly enough of an antidote for the total poison into the red ones. Ensure the antidote breaks down quickly so you can't build up an excess.

Now anyone who fails to heed your commands and doesn't eat the otherwise-identical candy covered chocolate things in an arbitrary marketing-derived order... dies! Muahahaha!

Everyone is a CEO

Regardless of whether you are single or married, employed or retired, every single person in this country is a CEO.

For example, I am the CEO (together with my wife, of course -- and above or below on the org chart, depending on who you ask) of the Morris Family Household Corporation.

I say this because managing a household is absolutely no different than managing a multinational corporation or the federal government, the numbers just have fewer zeroes. Of course, absolute digits really don't matter a whole lot anyway, because in the end it's looking at the numbers in relative percentage terms that shows where the truth lies.

Furthermore, one can draw the conclusion that the majority of businesses and governments must be poorly managed, as so too are the financial affairs of most families -- the same average household with 150%+ of their disposable income in debt represents the same average household that contains the same average people in many top managerial and political roles...

How can you get ahead if you don't even track what's going on?

The Morris Family Household Corporation has been a highly successful business venture thus far; this has been primarily due to a lot of hard work (as it should be).

Over the last few years, the corporation has been through a merger (the marriage of my wife and I), a year of capital intensive research and development leading to the introduction of a new product line (our 5 month old son), and ongoing capital investment.

The majority of our success has stemmed from how we do business.

We have an annual capital and operating budget, we establish goals, and we are always aware of exactly where every cent of our income goes (the majority, of course, is to taxes).

We also produce income statements and maintain a balance sheet, which allow for the easy analysis of our state of affairs.

We track expenditures by cost center and can make comparisons over time.

Most importantly, we use this information to make strategic management decisions.

Our last decision of such resulted in the relocation of our corporate headquarters to capitalize on an opportunity that will significantly increase our total revenue in 2011 over 2010, while at the same time halving our actively employed staff (my wife doesn't need to work), eliminating the expense, time, and risk of a work commute, and significantly reducing our fixed expenses.

So, fellow CEO, are you aware of how your business is performing?

I will follow this up on a later date with a lesson on budgeting.

Lastly, on an entirely unrelated note, have a watch: