Things I Have Learned (Vol. I)

I've been living away from home for a few weeks now. Things I have learned:

1. I am still alive. This is a big plus.

2. GOD DAMN I have a lot of stuff. Where did this all come from??

3. The Roomba is a lot better at vacuuming than I am. It might not be very good either but it sure keeps at it longer than I do.

4. When you leave hot dog buns on the counter for nearly two weeks they turn stale. But when you have A STEAMER, you can turn them back into wonderful almost-new fresh buns. I am not even making this up. It is like magic or some crap.

5. That Funny Smell is the cork thing you put the pans on. Being boiled in the water under the steamer. Because you took the steamer off to check the buns, but then the goddamn cork thing stuck to the bottom of the steamer when you put it back in the pot. Brown water comes out of it too. I think it'll dry out back to normal.